The heart knows !

Validation and confirmation. Probably the most powerful tools in our mind that we believe is needed to base our self-esteem upon. I had a good talk with myself and my guide. What causes anger, frustration and the rest of the list of negative emotions ? And I came up with these two. If you don’t get validated or confirmed in the aspects you possess as a human being you’ll end up picking one of those negative emotions from the list. My last blog was about fear. You could see this new blog as a kind of follow up on that one...

The sad thing is from birth until the cradle we keep on searching for those two. As if we're made into junkies who can’t live without. Needing it to feel good about ourselves. I sometimes believe it’s the only thing that drives our brain, the only supplement that satisfies it and calms it down. But in all fairness we can’t help but needing it. But that’s only because many times it's confused with feeling of love when we were young. Adults like smiling babies and babies love smiling adults. And because we love that smile we soon grow into doing anything we can to receive it. Because no smiles will soon be associated with the feeling of doing wrong and if you don’t know due to poor communicating you’re left in wondering why. With other words: you imprisoned yourself within your own brain.

If I’ve learned one thing from the brain (some will call it ego) is that it can’t stand the unknown. It in combination with duality will drive you absolutely bananas. It could write positive outcomes but 9 out of 10 it’s worse case scenarios. Why ? You didn’t get validated or confirmed. We NEED to know if we did okay. If our work is appreciated, if the painting we’ve made is admired. our promotion, our new car, our new sound system, our new lipstick, clothes , a music piece this list could go on forever. Can a relationship survive without saying the words ‘I love you’ ? It probably could…Okay I’ll admit it, those words are without a doubt the sweetest words to come out of a human being. Though I love them, technically it’s still validation cause it will confirm your love. I’m just challenging you to think outside the box. Could we live without compliments ? Could we develop a self-esteem without it ?

The brain to me should not have total control. It should be a transmitter and receiver and a place to store memories. Nothing more, nothing less. Anything else you do with it will cause pain to yourself or others when it keeps on searching for ‘the’ two. If you give in you’ll miss out on the opportunity to listen to the one thing that knows all and can be nothing but pure:

Your heart. The heart doesn’t need validation nor confirmation because it ‘knows’. The heart does not doubt or second guess. It doesn’t need a series of words out of somebody elses mouth. Be honest, would you need those two if you’d listen to your heart ? I’ll say it again: the heart knows ! If it ‘knows’ what will you win by creating figments of your imagination of which you honestly don’t know what its outcome will be ? We’ve all been there, especially grown up people. The heart lives in the ‘now’ and the mind persistently chases an unknown future. How come we spend so many hours on things we don’t know in advance ? What would be left if we assume it’s possible to live without ‘the’ two ? So no one telling you you’re great, that’s a lovely drawing you’ve made and so on…I’m not saying it’s wrong I’m just asking what if you don’t have to depend upon it relating to your self- esteem… So also no negative comments that could tear down your self-esteem.

I believe we would all be doing much better ! Because what is left would be an unconditional kind of love and fulfillment towards yourself but also each other. We would enjoy everything we create without anyone bringing us down because bringing someone down would cease to exist. All battles, duality and fictional thoughts inside your head as well….